Kryptonite

Mr. 1969 has started a rigorous new job. He is in hardcore training for a year, at the end of which, he will own his own business.  I fully support him in this endeavor and know that the long term outlook for our family could be huge. I never blogged about it but the last year has been a challenging one for our family. My hubby was laid off from his job last year. While we weren’t affected too hard financially due to a good package and unemployment, it was a hard adjustment for him personally. I didn’t share it on the blog because some family stuff is simply private and I didn’t need my hubby’s business out on Front Street as he dealt with that transition.

I can’t lie, I was so spoiled having him home for that time. Our house was immaculate, he dropped and picked up the boys every day so I could work, train, etc. All I did was cook dinner. With him undertaking this new endeavor, my life of leisure has come to a screeching halt. SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEECH.

Mr. 1969 has to now leave the house by 7:30am. The boys have to be at school at 8am. I have also started the Triathlon training schedule. Most mornings, I am up at 4:45 and at the gym by 5-5:30am. I swim laps or run or bike for a good hour then roll back in at 6:30am. I have to come back, get the boys dressed and make breakfast and then drop them to school. After which, I come home and get ready to work.

While I do work from home, I usually have appointments and sales calls daily. I now have to be back by 4pm to pick up the boys, do home work, make dinner, etc. Mr. 1969 works till 6pm most evenings and till 8pm two days a week.

Right now, I am doing EVERYTHING. While I am not complaining because I am so excited for my husband to have this opportunity and I will support him 100% in this endeavor so he can focus on what he needs to do to be successful…..can I just share that Superwoman is TIRED?

Yesterday was the 2nd day of my training calendar. The first day I swam 1,o00 yards and biked for 30 minutes. Yesterday, I swam 1,250 yds and then got out of the pool and ran 3 miles. I worked all day. I came home and whipped up a Valentine’s dinner for the men. I also baked red velvet cupcakes. When I finally stopped moving, I laid in my bed and stared at the ceiling and realized I was completely and utterly exhausted.

I know that two weeks from now, I will be used to the flow. You know me, I will just make it work. I have been spoiled for months by a great hubby who did everything for our family. Getting back into Superwoman mode is taking longer than I thought.

As I type this, I am about to get ready to head into the city for a lunch appointment and a meeting with my boss. *sigh*

I take on too much. Usually it’s because I want to. This time, I have to.  This is what sacrifice is all about. I am focused on the long term goals for my family and when my hubby comes home late and still has homework, I know that it’s worth it to have his back and keep our house running smoothly.

I just needed to tell someone….I really am tired.

There, I said it. Off to work. Somebody get my cape!

Cause We Like To Party

This weekend, Mr. 1969 and I attended the 50th wedding anniversary of his cousins up in Harrisburg, PA. I knew it was going to be a memorable trip when we drove by a jeep with a 6ft dead black bear strapped to the roof. Now I have seen deer strapped to a car but a bear???? Who does this?

Poor Yogi!

When we arrived at the reception, we noticed our table had a name  “I Feel Good”. As we looked around, it appeared that every table was named after a song. We didn’t think much of it until after our meal when they announced that they they going to play each song and the table had to get up and dance. At the end of every table dancing, the happy couple would select the best table for a prize.

For anyone that knows me….winning makes me happier than Ch.ar.lie Sh.een. I am competitive by nature and if I have to make a fool of myself, then I need to win a prize for doing so!

In ten seconds, I had an idea and the whole table was set with their marching uh, dancing orders. We watched all of the tables get up and it was so much fun. Our biggest competition was table 7 who danced to “Midnight Train To Georgia”. They had their Pips moves down!

When our turn came up, the strains of James Brown filled the air. The ladies at our table were in backup dancer mode and I was out of site. The star of this dance? Our secret weapon, Mr. 1969 who has been practicing to be James Brown all of his natural born life. He LOVES James Brown. Well, he put on a James Brown show for those folks. He did spins, the side step moves and had the crowd on their feet. They weren’t ready for our showstopper though. He broke down and got on his knees and out I came with a floor length coat and covered his shoulders. The crowd went wild. If that wasn’t enough, he jumped back up, knocked the coat on the ground and started dancing again and ended with a half split.  Not only did we win, we were the highlight of the party. Everyone is still calling us and laughing.

It turned out to be a great party despite the poor bear (my heart is still broken). What a celebration to have family and friends join you as you celebrate 50 years of love. If that doesn’t make you feel good….I don’t know what will.

The Point of it All….

When people ask me how it is that I haven’t killed and dumped the body have stayed married for so long, I always feel like they are looking at Mr. 1969 and I through rose colored glasses. I will tell anyone that marriage is far from easy. Living with one person, forever, is like being in jail with a roommate. You either need to figure out how to make your peace with the situation fast or you will both need to sleep with one eye open at all times.

We have many differences. He is neat. I am *cough*comfortable cleaning things on my own schedule *cough*. He is hyper and cannot sit still for one minute. I relish nothing more than peace and quiet, a good tv show, fuzzy pajamas and my couch. He loves to visit every single family member, even ones that are like 3rd cousins once removed. I like my immediate family, my cousins around the Holidays and uh, yeah….that’s it. He is nice, always happy and uber friendly. He always looks at the positive side of every situation. I can be evil.

They say opposites attract, and they do. However, you may not want to live with your opposite for life. Having this relationship takes work. I have to pause and stop myself from saying the first evil thing that springs to mind. Sometimes I succeed and sometimes I fail miserably. I have to try and not be so selfish at times. I have to stop being upset about the things he does wrong and try to focus on what he does right.

It requires maturity. There, I said it. Healthy, adult relationships require maturity. Not just from one party…from both people involved. I fully believe that as long as both parties are committed to having a healthy relationship, things can work. The minute one side starts to waiver, you need to start working on fixing the problems. Issues fester when not addressed and you cannot always address things by arguing.

Too many folks are in love with the “idea” of getting married. You need to spend time getting to know someone. Be honest with yourself. Are you both good at working through problems together? When bad times hit, do you see yourself sticking with this person? There are always huge signs when you’re dating. Don’t ignore the signs.

A woman that always looks good, tight outfits, nice shoes and bags will want to keep living her life the same way when she is married. There will be shopping!  As a man, you need to recognize and understand that. She won’t magically stop shopping now that she is your wife. The key is, will she also learn to curb some of her spending to invest in your future together. Will she put your needs above hers?

A man that likes to hang out with his boys will still want to do so after he is married. You met him that way, it will not go away. The key is, is he willing to cancel those plans with the boys if there is something you want to do with him? Does he put your needs first? If he won’t do that now, what makes you think he will do it when he’s married?

I think people rush into relationships out of fear, lonliness and peer pressure. There is nothing wrong with moving slow, dating and understanding what your needs are before you can expect anyone else to understand them. Self love leads to true love.

Date responsibly my friends!

 

 

My future’s not so bright…

A few weeks ago, I shared with you how Mr. 1969 took down the Wu Tang Christmas lights right? A week ago, he couldn’t sleep so knowing I had to drive to Princeton the following morning, he decided to go out and fill up my gas tank (yes, he can be sweet when he wants to be) and since he was out, he decided to hit up the Mac machine and get some cash, then swing by the library and drop Tali 2′s book in the bin.

When I woke up in the morning, I got in the car and started driving to New Jersey for an early morning sales call. I glanced in the back seat and noticed a Razor scooter. Tali 2 has a scooter but I knew it was in the garage. I called Mr. 1969 and he told me that when he went to drop off the library book, there was a scooter in the parking lot. Since it was midnight and it seemed unclaimed, he brought it home for Tali 1.

Flash forward to yesterday, I found out that he found an unclaimed case of water at the tennis courts when the boys went to play tennis and brought it home.

Why do I have a vision of him being 65 and my entire garage is filled with stuff he found? I told him he has hoarding tendencies and he denied it.

I swear he is going to be one of those old men….

“Babe, look what I found, someone threw away a perfectly good suit and I brought it home. I can wear it to church on Sunday”

“I found a nice velvet chair, only missing one leg, it will look great in the living room!”

“Honey, did you say you needed some new shoes? What size do you wear?”

Pray for me people. Pray for me.

St. Patrick’s Day-Wu Tang Style

The Wu Tang house still has their Christmas lights up. They aren’t on, but they’re still up. The ones on their hedges look crazy since they have been out there over two blizzards and more than a few rainstorms.  Mr. 1969 and I shake our heads everytime we look over there.

This morning, I returned from the gym only to notice all of the lights on the hedges were gone. (The ones on the house are still up).

Me: Babe, the Wu Tangs finally took the Christmas lights down just in time for St. Patrick’s Day.

Mr. 1969: No they didn’t.

Me: They did. Look out the window! See, the one’s on the bushes are gone.

Mr. 1969: I know. I took them down.

Me: What?

Mr. 1969: I took them down. I got tired of looking at that sh*t and I went out there last night, took them down and put them in a trash bag and left them on their steps.

Me: *crickets*

Mr. 1969: Top O the morning to you. Now take your sh*t and put it away.

From our house to yours……………….enjoy the St. Patty’s Day festivities and toast a green beer in honor of my hubby and his ongoing battle with the Wu’s.

Cause I don’t have enough to do

With a husband who lives and dies for the Pittsburgh Steelers, you already know what is happening at Casa de 1969 this weekend right?

Two snaps if your guess involved a whole slew of frat brothers, two kids under 8, a buffet of game food, beer and well, me. Before you say anything else, please know that I have a sorority meeting on Superbowl Sunday at 3pm. Now I love my Sorors but clearly, they are not thinking. I remember the year we had a meeting and the Giants were in the Superbowl. Uh yeah….guess who was in charge of a committee, needed to give a report and never showed up? *hand raised*

So yeah, I will be doing a whole lot of prep work on Saturday so I can just cook on Sunday and throw the rest of the stuff in when I return (I am only going for one hour, I swear! My exit strategy is TIGHT!)

I am developing my menu. My husband is asking for jerk chicken wings, fried chicken wings and buffalo wings and my chipotle meatballs *blank stare*. What happened to ordering pizza and some hoagies? I am sooo not feeling up to it this year but as a good wife, I will get it together before the end of the week.

Does anyone have any Superbowl recipes they would like to share? If so, send them over. I have the Steelers by three. Who ya got?

P.S. Why am I a friend of “Troy Polamalu’s hair on Facebook and Twitter? LMAO!

Husbands…can’t live with em

We had a friend’s son hang out with us and spend the night last night. The boys had a blast playing together all day. We wore them out! I put them to bed around 9pm, Mr. 1969 went upstairs to watch a game (and fall asleep) and I laid on the couch downstairs reading a book. After a long day…I was planning on having an uneventful night.

Well around 10:30pm, I could hear somebody being violently ill. If I couldn’t hear it, I surely wouldn’t have missed two boys screaming “Tali 2 is puking everywhere!” *sigh*

My boys have bunk beds. The kind where there is a twin on top and a full sized bed below. Tali 2 was in the top bunk which now looked like something spilled in Hell’s Kitchen and he was so dazed and confused, he laid back down  and went back to sleep in the middle of all the damage. It was indeed an assault on the senses.

I sent the two boys (who were delighting in screaming and trying to climb up to look at my baby and laugh) in to sleep in our guest room and tucked them in and shut the door.  I woke up Tali 2, made him stand up in the bed and take everything off. I scooped him up in a big towel and gave him a hot shower, rubbed him down with lotion and dressed him in some fleece jammies.

“Mom” “Yes baby” “Can I have socks?” Yes, I even got him clean socks….you know how particular he is about his attire….even when sick (Viva la cold pants revolution (c) Jameil).

 After he was dressed, I put him in my bed next to Mr. 1969 (who was STILL sleeping).

I went downstairs, grabbed the bleach, rags, my bucket, mop and a pair of gloves and came back upstairs to work on that bed. The pillows went straight into a garbage bag. OUT! Everything else I threw in the boys tub and washed till I at least got them clean enough to put in the washing machine. Then I started scrubbing the mattress. Then I decided to just clean the whole bathroom.

When I was done and finally went back in to the bedroom to check on Tali 2, Mr. 1969 FINALLY woke up and said “What happened?”

I cussed him out for about ten minutes. How are you in the bedroom next to your kids and you don’t hear a thing? I was downstairs and I heard it. I left him with Tali 2 and went back downstairs to sleep on the couch.

Did I mention that yesterday, I left the house at 7:30 am and did a one hour spin class and then swam about 20 laps afterwards? Can I tell you how good my old muscles are feeling this morning after mopping, scrubbing and then sleeping on the couch?

So you know I was more than a little salty at Mr. 1969 this morning right?

He came downstairs and made breakfast for the two older boys. He came and sat next to me on the couch and said “Do you remember what happened the last time BOY “Z”  spent the night at our house?”

I thought for a good minute….”Yes. The fish incident!”

“Clearly we can’t have him back over. He causes Tali 2 to react violently.”

See? Even when I’m mad at him, he makes me laugh.

What Marriage is Really Like

The other night, Mr. 1969 and I had a disagreement. At first, it was a nice pleasant discussion but as things sometimes go….it got more heated.

As usual, he thought I was not being rational and I thought he was arguing just for the sake of arguing. Either way, I ended up walking away from the whole thing and going to bed. I guess I broke that “no going to bed angry” rule that all couples are supposed to adhere to.

The next morning he called me at work cracking up. Why? Cause he found this little note I left for him.

Fight over. Laughter and the ability to let shyt go always wins.

One to Grow On

The 1969 Family is back from a wonderful and much needed vacation. The trip was fabulous and the entire family really enjoyed themselves. We came back last Wednesday and as it turns out, Mr. 1969′s niece was graduating over the weekend from Lincoln University with her Masters degree.

Since most of the family was coming from out of town for the graduation on Sunday, we decided to host a party for her at our house on Saturday. That didn’t leave a whole lot of time to prepare.

As we discussed the party in the days leading up to the event, I found myself snapping at Mr. 1969 for everything. How many people are coming? What are they bringing? At one point, I had to really check myself because if I were planning something for my family, I would have been all excited and sunshiney (yeah I made that up) sweet.

Looking back, I was being really nasty about the party for no reason. I love Mr. 1969′s niece and she has worked hard to get that Masters. She is a single mom and she managed to find a way to go back to college and not only graduate, she returned to earn an advanced degree and I am really proud of her.

Sometimes, as wives, we are just nasty for no reason. Hell, sometimes as human beings, we walk around with an attitude just because. I knew that Mr. 1969 would love having his family over. I knew that, as always, he would help clean the house, mow the lawn and do everything so all I would have to do was cook. I know I have a great husband and he doesn’t ask for much. I was feeling selfish and lazy and just didn’t feel like being bothered with people. My husband didn’t check me but after I had said something mean to him….I realized that I was being difficult for no reason.

On Saturday, I put my game face on and we threw a great party. His niece was so appreciative and when she stood by me in the kitchen and said “It’s so nice to have all of my family here and it’s not because someone is sick or for a funeral.” I was so glad that I recognized that I was being selfish and mean and got it together. I know when I am wrong and I was really wrong.  She deserved this celebration and everyone danced, ate and enjoyed themselves.

I need to do better and I am working on it. At least I’m aware right? Knowing is half the battle.

Birth Control

On Tali 1′s birthday last week, Mr. 1969 decided to take him to the Sixers game. While at the game, I kept getting texts saying that Tali 1 was super hyped, excited and basically off the chain. I ignored Mr. 1969 cause I figured Tali 1 was just being your typical 8 year old boy getting to stay out late at a basketball game with his Daddy. Hell, you’d be hyped too. Until I saw the evidence.

I will preface this post by letting you know that Tali 1 was begging his Daddy for a Water Ice at the game. Mr. 1969 looked at the small cup and the $5 price tag and said “Hell No”. Tali 1 then asked for those clappy things you get at the game. The rest is Tali history.