Priceless

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In case you haven’t noticed…I have been extremely busy with work and juggling the day to day aspects of my life. They sold us on these jobs as “work from home” but the times when I am actually home are few and far between. I spend most of my time in my car between sales calls. In the last month alone, I have been to Pittsburgh, Chicago and New York. Crazy right?

Factor in school shopping and getting the boys ready and it has been a crazy month for me. As a working mom, I constantly struggle with making sure that my kids needs are always being met before anything else.

I place my boys at the top of my TO-DO list and everything falls into place after them. I have a lot of friends that don’t agree with me. They put their jobs first, their spouse, etc. In my mind, my job is important but not more than my kids. My husband is extremely important but he is a grown man and can fend for himself if need be. My kids need us to provide a happy and stable household and they can’t do that on their own. They rely on us. I wouldn’t even want my husband to put me over his children. Trust me when I say, if you take care of my boys and are a good father? That takes care of 80% of my personal needs. What can I say? I’m a simple girl.

I think back to when I was a childless woman. My needs were shopping, being cute and having fun. I enjoyed life to the fullest but let’s be frank….it was all about me. There was nothing wrong with that either! That’s what being childless is all about. You should be out enjoying yourself and doing for self.

As the demands of motherhood crept in, I relished taking care of  my boys despite relinquishing all of my selfish time. No more running out to the movies, dinner, blowing an entire paycheck on a trip or shopping. I can’t lie, some of these things were harder for me to let go than others and I struggled with it, still do sometimes. cough*shopping*cough

Now that I am out of the baby phase (*sniff* Tali 2 is getting ready for his first day of Kindergarten in two weeks), I am finally getting a balance back. I have replaced the majority of hanging out with friends once a week with working out and taking care of my health. I have slowed down on the shopping out of other financial needs for our home and our children and instead found small indulgences that I can’t live without and hung on to these as a means of pampering myself when I need some ME time (shout out to coffee shops, pedicures and the occassional trip to Target) to recharge my batteries.

I have grown up a little and shifted my priorities without losing myself in the process. No, I can’t do all of the things I used to and I truly miss that freedom sometimes. However, I do have two boys that need me and love me. They make me laugh at myself and really focus on the world around me. I get to help them grow into responsible young men. I get to experience life through their eyes every single day.

I think I actually made out in this life process. Who needs happy hours and martinis when you come home to cupcakes, family and love? Like they say…it’s Priceless.

10 Responses »

  1. someone I know puts her job first too – her rationale is that without it, her child would not have all the things he needs – as a single mom she really feels pressed to succeed and provide materially but I sometimes wonder……………..

    • Damali…

      I definitely get her rationale and don’t fault her reasoning. It’s true, without work, she can’t take care of her child. For me, if my kids aren’t happy…I can’t focus on anything.

  2. I’m feeling you on the post. But I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. On that 5 year countdown to being an empty nester. That will be a whole new journey for us.

  3. I know what you mean. As a single mom I often felt much guilt when I couldn’t go on field trips and be “room mom” because I had to work. At those time, I kind of felt that I was putting my job first — but I wasn’t. When i’m at work I am 100% at work but when I’m with the children they have 100% of my focus. Now that they are 20 and (almost) 16, I am getting my life back and I’m remembering what it was like to do things for myself.

  4. It is so worth the 18 year sacrifice. But once they are 18 and older, all of a sudden they are trying to clock you. “Mom..where are you? When will you be home?” LOL

  5. I’m feeling you on this one. I’m a single mother and since year 2000, my son has always been my number one priority. I’ve always made certain someone (i.e., myself, his father, grandmother, grandfather etc.) participates in his field trips (after going on a trip prior and one of the TEACHERS lost a student at the zoo…I made it mandatory a family member attended or he didn’t go[which never happened]). My friends laugh at me because I calulate my leave…I give my son a couple days for sickness, a couple days for me for sickness, two to three days for Thanksgiving and Christmas…you get my drift. I pull out my calendar to check to see if I didn’t use the alloted leave for the previous month to fit in “Me Time Breaks” (like today ;-)

    Everyone’s priorites are different, but I know my son will always be my #1 concern.

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