I was reading a magazine article about women and their friendships. It described a woman’s friends as being her worst enemies. The article talked about the end of the s.e.xi.ntheci.ty movie where the ladies are all sitting around the table and 50 year old Samantha tells them that she has just left the man who loves her, stuck with her as she battled cancer…why? Because she yearned to be true to her inner Samantha. As she said this, her trio of girlfriends co-signed and applauded her decision. This 50 year old woman just walked away from a two year relationship so she could continue to sleep around and be free instead of work through her issues with a good man who obviously loved her and not one friend challenged it.
The article definitely made me think. As women, do we let our female friends sabotage us? Where do we draw the line between being supportive and being honest with our girls. Do we hold our real opinions in check in order to maintain a friendship?
There are times when I hold my tongue with friends because I know they will inevitably get mad at me for my opinion even if they asked for it. I think a real friend can take brutal honesty and know that you aren’t judging them. They know you really care.
As women, I think we like to ask for advice only to have people tell us what we want to hear. We don’t really expect true opinions, especially ones that differ from our own. We welcome the co-signing and as a result, when our girls ask for our take on their situations, we tend to offer what we are seeking…..love and acceptance .
No wonder men can’t figure us out.