Lumps of Coal

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A current popular topic in blogland is gift giving during the holidays. We’re not talking about what to buy for mommy and grandpop. No, we’re discussing those awkward situations.

Do I HAVE to buy a gift for someone that I’m only….uh…..bumping uglies with?

Both men and women are struggling with this topic. So much so that folks are arguing and debating it almost everywhere I go.

Now I know, you all consider me an old married lady but who better to get your dating advice from than a woman that has successfully kept a man through almost ten years of marriage and two children? Isn’t it better to get advice from someone in a successful relationship than to call your single friend with no man/woman and take their sage advice? ‘Nuff said.

Anywho, here’s my take on this topic.

If you are over 25 and dating someone for more than two months, yes, you should get them a gift. PERIOD. It’s about respect and courtesy. HOME TRAINING.

I don’t care if you have only seen each other under cover of darkness, after a 3am call on the 2nd Friday of every month. I don’t care if he is only one of five guys you are dating. I don’t care if you haven’t declared her your official girl. If for two or more months, you have been seeing each other pretty regularly, BUY A GIFT.

Now….do you buy them Tiffany engraved cufflinks? HELL NO.

Do you get her those Gucci shoes she asked for? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

You get them a small gift. A nice gesture.

You were together that one time and he mentioned he liked Tupac? Pick up that Tupac autobiography for him or make him a Tupac playlist or CD.

She said she can’t see you because her family is coming for the holidays and she is hosting dinner? A day before they arrive, stop by and drop off some nice flowers for her dinner table and then leave.

Funds are low? Show up with some mistletoe and a can of whipped cream and play decorate the elf. (Just kidding….okay, maybe not.) A small thoughtful gesture goes a long way.

Now none of this counts if the two of you have implicitly stated to each other that neither of you means anything more than body parts. If you have had that conversation then NO, do not play yourselves and get gifts for each other. If one of you veers from this and buys a gift…..don’t get your panties or boxers in a bunch when the recipient says “Thanks” and then has nothing for you. YOU PLAYED YOURSELF HOMIE.

Let me know if you have any questions and Happy Festivus.

25 Responses »

  1. Really though Amadeo, if you are a grown azz man or woman, you have been seeing someone for more than two months…BUY THEM A SMALL GIFT.

    Being cheap is one thing…cheap and tacky? Ewwwww.

    $25 bucks won’t kill ya.

  2. …Decorate the elf??? Lmao

    Question! What if 1. I’m under 25 and 2 bought someone a gift and 3. I’m not with them anymore
    …. I wanna still give it to em, kinda… Buuuut I’m thinkin it should prolly go to my brother, huh? Can’t let that 16euro go to waste!

  3. I have always advised people to do what feels right to them. Like you, I have also advised others not to get hurt if they dont’ get anything in return. I also believe in giving others the same that they give you.

  4. I agree with what Kayla said. It can’t be this deep.

    I think folks should buy what they’re comfortable giving. If something gives you pause, don’t do it.

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